Puppy Saver Steve

Steve Souza, Super-Jello Shot boy, recently took his Super Hero activities OUTSIDE of Dewey Beach to help a puppy found stranded on the road. While he apparently met several people of great importance, and merited news attention, Steve not only declined to give any publicity to 5 Bayside, but also declined to transport the puppy back to 5Bayside, where it could have been put in the blender for mixed drinks as well as possible jello shooters.

Therefore, while normally Steve stands on his Super-Hero pedestal, he LOSES for thinking ONLY of himself while rescuing puppies. He should, however, get credit for refusing to rescue maidens in distress, a true virtue at 5 Bayside !!!!!

The following adventure happened on my way back from Dewey on Sunday and is reprinted with the permission of the Queen Anne Times.

"5 Bayside Court house member Steve Souza rescued a 10 week old lost puppy from certain death while driving home from Dewey beach last weekend. The adorable puppy was walking on the shoulder of route 404, with no owner in site when Steve put the puppy in the back seat of his car (see attached picture) and drove around Queen Anne Maryland (population 176) looking for the puppies owner.

Souza explained, "I was driving around thinking about databases, Java programming and world peace when I saw the puppy. Chicks dig puppy and baby rescuers, so I figure what the hell". Souza continued, "I drove around town and asked about 5 people if they recognized the puppy. They told me to go to the house with red shudders, as it was the mayors house, and he might know."

Asked if anyone else in 5 Bayside could have made the rescue Souza responded, "No, friggin' way! It's not that they don't care about other living creatures, it's that they are drunk. Don't get me wrong, not caring is a contributing factor, just not the primary reason". Souza went on to explain, "They would have been passed out in the car, or vomiting out the window. I don't even think I could rescue puppies under those conditions. You know...I always try to be alert. Especially when around puppies and babies. It's kind of funny, even while at the Starboard chatting it up with the ladies, I always keep one eye out for a puppy or baby in danger, and the other on the ladies cleavage. Cleavage is important, but so are puppies and babies. Some women at the Starboard think I'm a really horrible conversationalist, but it's not that. I'm just focusing on my next rescue. "

Souza tried to convince the mayor to keep the puppy as a town mascot. The mayors wife wanted to keep the puppy, but said that their other dog would kill it. Souza next encountered Buddy Thomas (picture attached holding the puppy) and gave him the puppy. When asked what he thought of Souza, Thomas responded "Souza's an idiot. Listen I'm no fan of puppies, but I would have taken 100 of them to get Souza the hell out of town."

Souza left town as quickly as he entered, promising to send the mayor pictures of the puppy so a "lost puppy" sign could be placed in the town post office. As Souza drove off I asked the mayor if he had any closing words and he responded with, "That Steve Souza, sure is one pain in the ass." Pain in the ass, or a hero for the ages; You decide.

Scoop Daily
Queen Anne Times"




  Puppy Saver Steve
Poor, Helpless, Cute Puppy
Queen Anne County's Man Of The Day Buddy Thomas

 
   
 

The Vote
The members of 5 Bayside are not animal haters ! Matter of fact, any one of us would have probably done the exact same thing if we had run across the helpless little pooch on our way home. No, it's not Steve's compassion that's at issue here, it's the fact that he was driving through Queen Anne County on Sunday morning instead of partying with his housemates at the Starboard that won him this week's vote. Way to go Steve !

Red Meat [Joel] 1 vote
1 vote
Satan [Jeff] 0 votes
0 votes
Homo-Lone Ed [Gall] 0 votes
0 votes
Guest Beater Gaack !! [Todd] 1 vote
1 vote
Ass Biter [Melanie] 0 votes
0 votes
Mickey Unger 0 votes
0 votes
Mickey Unger 1 vote
1 vote
Sportsdykebanger [Alan] 0 votes
0 votes
Voice Of Reason [Russ] 0 votes
0 votes
Gay Pari 0 votes
0 votes
Puppy Dog Saver Steve [Souza] 5 votes
5 votes
Toilet Sleeper [Jimbo] 0 votes
0 votes
Larissa 0 votes
0 votes
Fat, Ugly Guest Bitches 2 votes
2 votes
Total votes cast: 10